It’s a beautiful day outside and I had nothing to do with it. – I’m inside a room, where I sit on a chair with my head in the clouds. Up there I tumble around, to look for the source, the source from which to create. It’s a crazy thing, that thing which is desire, that sets us on fire and moves from within. The electrifier of every wire plugged in, that makes this world spin. – Currently, I long for being outside, out where the sun would caress my skin, and the breeze gently blow away the clouds of thoughts from my mind. How wonderful would it be to be there, outside.. But I’m inside, enduring the longing, pondering the longing. It’s been too long since I didn’t care. I can’t go because I wait for a sign, the sign that tells me my task is complete. the sign that tells me “you’re free! You can go anywhere that your heart wants to be…” but it takes sitting down and drudging the drudgery to get where your heart wants to be. So I stay here and dwell in misery while the sun is laughing at me. The more I think about it the more terrible the thought of missing out on this day, knowing that tomorrow it’s gonna be over.. the sky might be grey, and the world surely spinning at full speed again, not allowing me to even remember the gloriousness of this day.. so full of possibilities, all left unused.. It’s a crazy thing, to want to do what you do while missing out on so many good things in each moment, in anticipation for an unknown good sometime later – It’s such a beautiful day outside, and I had nothing to do with it..
That sounds quite sad but somewhat hopeful. Interesting combination makes me think.